Over Sharing vs Bottling it Up
Just how big is your mouth? :) I often ask myself this in a social situation. It seems I always have this tendency to either spill too much information (such as, "my deodorant isn't working today") or clam up, missing out on an opportunity to make a connection with someone.
Where, then, is the magical fine line? That's the definition of being real for me. I've noticed that when I blabber more than necessary, I'm either nervous or not feeling like myself - not feeling REAL. When you're your true self around the people you're the most comfortable with, you don't feel the need to be super funny, super interesting, or super spiritual/deep. You share what's in your heart - nothing less, and nothing more.
If there had never been sin in the garden of Eden, I doubt anyone would suffer from social anxiety lol. I bet introverts would peacefully observe when they felt like it, and then share when it felt right too. The same way, extroverts wouldn't be self conscious of their natural spontaneous personalities, and neither would fall slaves to it as if they always had to be entertaining.
Here's what I think God wants us to realize: we don't HAVE to be any specific way. He loves and uses us where we're at in each situation. And I believe that the right reaction is the one that comes with peace.
It can be easy to look at a funnier friend and wonder if you're less interesting for not being able to crack jokes all the time. And said funny friend might believe the lie that if they're not quieter, they can't possibly be as serious/deep/smart as their introvert or brainiac friend.
See, being real is being okay with who you are - and whatever you feel naturally compelled to bring to the table.
As for me, I've given up trying to define which group I belong to. I realized that more important than putting a label on myself (as if we're a product to be sold), I should just relax and follow God's lead in whatever He wants me to be at the moment. Plus, on a personality test, I scored about the same for several different types, so who knows! lol.
Or perhaps I shouldn't have shared that :)...
I’m a member of American Christian Fiction Writers and have a bachelor’s degree in Advertising from Brazil, where I was born. There I worked as an English-Portuguese translator for legal documents, until moving to the San Francisco Bay Area in 2006 for a marketing internship in a retail business. During the year of 2008 I published and wrote for Crosswalk Community Church’s monthly newsletter, The Pedestrian, as well as all of their ministries’ publications. Now a stay-at-home mom in San Benito, TX, I’m actively pursuing publication in the Christian industry, and have just been named a Genesis winner in the Contemporary Fiction category (YAY!).
For more information, leave a comment or email me at anneblf@yahoo.com. You can also follow me on twitter (@AnnePradoWrites) or visit my other blog, The Bored Mommy. Hope to hear from you soon!
I've felt that same "oversharing" shame when leaving a social setting. I used to spend too much time wondering how I came off or if others thought I talked too much, etc. It's getting better, but I agree with your point in your true self being answered with peace:-) Thanks for over-under-just plain sharing!
ReplyDeleteOh glad I'm not alone :). I think people aren't nearly as worried about what we say or don't say as we are lol (they're busy worrying about themselves!). Thanks for commenting!
ReplyDelete